HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU ARE SELF-ACCEPTING?

HOW DO I KNOW IF I AM SELF-ACCEPTING?

James R. Fisher, Jr., Ph.D.
© September 7, 2009

* * *

Some of you found the missive "Is it More Important to be Loved or Respected" intriguing, when I claimed it is academic if you are not self-accepting. That is because your whole approach to life emanates from self-acceptance, or the lack thereof. A common question of those responding was: how can I tell if I'm self-accepting. This is my gauge:

* * *

(1) You don't have any trouble saying "no" when it is in your best interest to do so.

(2) You don't own other people's problems.

(3) You don't carry other people's burdens. You allow them to work out the consequences of their own actions or miseries without feeling guilty for doing so.

(4) You don't allow a family member, a friend, a boss or a company to compromise your values and talk you into something that benefits them and puts yourself in jeopardy.

(5) You don't buy into something that is too good to be true.

(6) You don't allow yourself to be duped by a priest, teacher, or other authority figure telling you something that is not consistent with what your past experience reveals and your gut tells you.

(7) You stay away from toxic people be they family members, work associates or anyone that demeans you in a way that you question your self-regard or that compromises your values.

(8) You're not for sale, ever!

JRF